Learning Your Strengths for More Energy

In my latest quarterly meetings I’m sharing the concepts from a phenomenal book. “Now Discover Your Strengths,” by Marcus Buckingham. It changes how people look at their own growth and development. The book works from a couple of essential rules.

First, we tend to be obsessed with our weaknesses and try to improve on them. The reality is that in any area where we’re truly weak, we can climb from pathetic up to really bad. So if you’re not good at math, you’ll never be good at it, no matter how hard you try.

Second, there’s a big difference between a skill and a strength. Many people spend time using skills, but not achieving peak performance. Buckingham’s definition of a strength is something you’re pulled toward and want to do. When you’re doing it, you’re highly engaged. You’re curious about how you can do it better. When you’re finished, you feel energized and want to do it again. If you look at your workday through that filter, you’d probably put your focus in different areas.

For example, I’m a person who’s good with numbers and finance, statistics and so forth. Although this is a skill of mine, if I spent all my time crunching numbers for a company, it would drain me. However, if you give me a chance to work with a challenging CEO or leadership team of a company, I’ll be there in a second. And even though I’ve worked hard, when I’m done I’m energized and want to do more. That’s a strength.

In an ideal situation, you should spend 80 percent of your time playing to your strengths, and spend 20 percent polishing your skills so they’re reasonable. This can create a new environment for growth. According to Buckingham, less than 20 percent of us get to play to our strengths.

Coach Kevin’s Challenge

Are there areas that your company can focus its training to develop employee strengths? Where can you leverage the desire to improve strengths, so you come away with a net energy gain?

Underperforming Team Member

What can you do with an under-performing member of your team? You need a plan instead of telling them you’re not happy, bluntly letting them know they have three months to turn things around or it’s not going to work.

I often see teams with toxic members. These are high-performing, incredibly valued members of a team, but they are toxic to the other team members and their work. In a recent example in my coaching, one team member was an A-player in every way except how they communicated with other people on the team. They jumped in and overpowered anyone on the team who disagreed with them. You’ve seen this kind of person: dominating conversations, aggressive and argumentative—just generally very stubborn.

For some people, a person like that might be easy to deal with. They’re typically so driven, so focused. But in terms of creating healthy team dynamics, someone like that will shut down many other team members. They’ll prevent the less-assertive people from speaking out. These quieter members process internally, and they often have the most brilliant insights. In the presence of a toxic team member, they don’t have a chance. They want nothing to do with the conflict, and if they had their way, they’d crawl under the table.

I’ve seen CEOs deal with these toxic members two ways. They ignore them, which throws the team into massive dysfunction. Or they fire them, which is an absolute waste, because these people bring incredible value in so many other ways.

My solution is something I call “Whacking them over the head with a 2×4.” And it works, most of the time. It’s a private conversation with the individual, where you tell them one-on-one how valuable they are, what they contribute to the team, and how you see them performing in the future. You explain that all their value is overshadowed by their behavior in the meetings, destroying the team dynamic.

You tell them that although you want them to grow with the company, if they can’t learn to be part of a healthy team dynamic, they’re going to have to leave. They need to see their demise staring them in the face if they don’t change. I find they usually react defensively and want to blame other people. I just did this several days ago, when this team member launched into reasons and justifications for their behavior. The key is that you have to be able to continue the conversation with them, until they see this as an opportunity to grow and evolve into a leader.

Coach Kevin’s Challenge

Who do have on your team who, although they’re incredibly value, do more damage than good to the team’s environment? What’s the direct truth you need to use to whack them over the head with a 2×4?